Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Stop Jumping to Conclusions!!

Ahhhh...jumping to conclusions, or "developing an opinion about something very quickly without gathering facts" (Pucci, 2006). It's pretty fun, huh?  If you are human, you have probably done this at least once in your life. Jumping to conclusions is by definition irrational, if we define rational as passing all three rational questions. Jumping to conclusions takes place when we get tired of looking for all the facts or we don't think we have time or it would be a waste of time to find all the facts for a certain situation.

There are two main ways we fallible human beings jump to conclusions:
1. Mind Reading, or acting as if we can read someone else's mind.  Mind reading occurs when we KNOW someone is thinking a certain way, and then we act on that "knowledge" without checking it out.  If we acknowledge that someone MIGHT be thinking a certain way, that is NOT mind reading.

How to stop jumping to conclusions by mind reading:
1. Recognize that it is impossible to know for sure what someone else is thinking. We may be able to see THAT someone is thinking (with an EEG or PET scan), but we cannot see WHAT a person is thinking.  Even if we know someone very well, we cannot know for certain what they are thinking. We can try to predict what they will say or do, but we will never know what thoughts they had that led them there unless they tell us.

2. Recognize that trying to know another's thoughts is pointless.  Because in the end what matters is how someone ACTS or TREATS US, knowing their thoughts is actually futile.  For example, I can have a less than flattering thought about someone, but unless I act on that thought, they are not offended.  I can also have a thought about giving someone a card or gift, but unless I act on that thought, that person will not receive the blessing.  If you find that someone is treating you badly, instead of trying to figure out what they are thinking, talk to them about their behavior and if they would be willing to begin treating you differently.

In my next blog I will discuss fortune telling, which is the second most common way we fallible human beings jump to conclusions.

For more in-depth discussion and illustration, pick up a copy of Aldo Pucci's The Client's Guide to Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy: How to live a healthy, happy life, no matter what!.















Pucci, A. R. (2006). The Client's Guide to Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy: How to live a healthy, happy life, no matter what! New York: iUniverse, Inc.

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